dont, im just.. not okay

im super scared to go to bed, tho

its ok

they're asleep

my heart and chest still hurt

hi, back

why am i a faliure? why do i cry everynight? i dont wanna die but i wish all my stress would go away but it cant! all my fears, all my doubts, all my flaws... i cant just be happy for once?

i just said this while crying;
my lungs are tired, my throat is sore, im a lame excuse for a daughter. im never productive, all i care about is my laptop. im failure,... i wish i could just be.. ok.! everyone hates me because i do nothing for them..,,! i dont deserve anything in life, god what do i do i want asnwers

can you check my comments please)

i have to slow down my breath rate, all alone by myself, trapped in this room, crying.

i start crying, then, i start breathing fast, in an attempt to clam down, i then breathe quicker and quicker, putting me in a state of panic, thats what happens to me. multiple times, each night.

update; had another nightmare
first, i had a nightmare of an insane person trying to kill me, second, my family repeatedly yelled at me to' just do it' , causing me to feel pressured, then one just pushed me, falling down a cylinder that felt endless, with annoyingly bright colors (yellow,orange,blue,green)
lowkey scared to go to bed tonight

not me over here wanting a care bear plushie:

2 minutes left,, bye, gn

i dont wanna have another nightmare like last night

i have 5 more minutes left before i gtg

i can barely control my breathing

imma go have a mental breakdown rq brb

💗💗💖💖💘💞💕💕💞💓💗💖

:D