[lmfao- 💀 lucky bastard, wish I had the means to get that out of it rn]

[ofc, hun.

and that sounds funny as hell lol]

[it was icky <3 I'm incredibly exhausted. college is stressful asf.

but i feel a bit better talking to you honestly. other than shitty 'friend',, how about you, sweetheart?]

[nope. nothing has changed. idk if it's gonna change at all.

and yea, I'm totally not having a meltdown. :) everything is perfectly a-ok.

but no, I don't wanna talk abt it.]

[not exactly. they're on a 'break' still, they're not talking to me. and they're not even considering what we have a relationship for right now. idk how long this is gonna last, but I honestly don't care anymore. like I said, doesn't matter.]

[your friend is a pathetic dickwad.

you're absolutely incredible, you amazing buotiful creature you]

[im......existing.

doesn't matter, hbu?]

[hi]

I'm existing.

glad ur doing okay, tho

...thx, hun. *lightly hugs you*

.....that sounds nice ig.

but none of those have worked. and don't tell me to try again, I have. I'm getting real tired of trying

I just want it to be quiet for once. that's all i ask for. and idk any way other than death :)

but.....if I'm dead I can't think. and if I can't think I can't feel feelings abt things. then things won't hurt anymore

I will. figure smth else out.

yknow, there's a thing called an insemination clinic. I can just get pregnant that way if I rlly want too

I just thought it looked neat.

yezzzzzzz tha bab

have I not made that obvious yet? yes, that's exactly why. I don't want a kid so why else would I do it

nice. some1 else actually knows it

but like....it'd be so neat. and I could put the kid up for adoption or sumn if you don't want it-