Vent
I like to think that I have changed for the better Id sit on the rock and watch that very pretty sunset that I love so much, the long grass swaying so poetically in the wind like it's calling to me, Telling me to come home. They clouds getting darker as the sun rests it's pretty head and I look at my only friend and question what I have done to meet such a person, one who wouldn't judge me for my flaws one with such a beautiful personality. One that my parents just love to compare me too. Such a amazing specimen.. oh what have I don't to deserve such a great acquaintance. So flawed yet so lovey, such a good friend. I look back at myself and wonder why just why couldn't I be so great, why couldn't I be such a lovely waste of space. Why couldn't I have a personality that made people care. Why couldn't I be more like them. Jealously stings at my heart as I think of all the beautiful people I have the privilege to know. Why couldn't I be more like them?, I look at my arm as tears grow from my emerald eyes, such beauty ruined by the grief and hurt, those beautiful scars covering them reminding me that I am strong. As the emotions leave from my body I look down to the ground and wonder why I did to deserve such a privilege life, how dare I be sad about what's happening in my useless little life. People have had it way worse so grow up and quit being upset about it. The memories of beer and abuse flood back to my head as I continue on my way with that perfect human I get to call my friend, fighting my hurt and pain I smile and laugh like everything is so very fine. That perfect person does not need you, they will find better and forget all about you, you mean nothing to them and you will never be good enough my mind would scream at me. Today oh this beautiful day I smile to myself and think how lucky I am to be alive.
3 years ago 28 views 1 frames
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