Jealousy

It hits hard for me
Very hard
I get jealous

Idk why

It's prob cause people get whatever or friends actually like them or get the amazing friends
Or talk about how good people they have
Or how good their friends are or ex
And they can do whatever

I mean..I couldn't be the only one right?
I just hate it when I get told this..because I can't get it
But I know.i can't get everything
But all I want is to be loved the same true
Is it so much
Must I kill myself to have that

...
I wanna hang out too
I wanna go out too
I wanna be included too..
"You hate going out"
...
But I wanna be part of it to..
...
All I hear now is people moan about how good this certain person is

I always talk about everyone at my school and how lucky I am to have them
..but I'm never talked about
Unless if it's hate about me
If I go back to the doctors or when I talk to my councilor I'ma.talk about it or ask my doctor for therapy to help it maybe