really the only working way to become white is
have sex with yourself
either get a different version of you from a different dimension or get male and female genitals
ya know, do your stuff
then if the baby is not white
then get a spell book that is buried 3 feet in the ground in europe
straight in the middle of europe
get it and say
"ga ga ga she she she yo yo yo ba ba ba white baby time now"
after that when you come home, the baby is white
suck that baby's toes
then you become white