Uh
Y’all ever scare yourself thinking about how fucked up you are?
I have so many issues I can’t even keep track
I’ve lost the feeling of sadness because I’ve been repressing it for years because of abuse
I take pain meds on a regular basis because I think it’ll heal something that doesn’t even hurt because my mind molds me to be this broken little person that needs as much help as it can get, wether it be through numbing the feelings or blocking off thoughts.
I know I’m not as bad as I think I am, but I can’t stop having the thoughts because if I don’t remind myself to “heal” I’ll get anxiety, which translates to physical pain to the point it’s unbearable and I need to do something before I collapse.
I’m not okay
And I’m sorry for dumping all of this on y’all.
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