I wanna quit everything, here's why.

So as some of you may know, my mental health is like a rollercoaster, first it's up for like, 2 days and then for the next 2 weeks, it's mid, until it's the next 2 months that are my lowest, and this must be one of those months. I am believe it or not, excited to return to school! Because of 3 main reasons. 1, to wow ppl with my stuff, 2, to play and run around bc I love running, and 3 to make new friends. But, now, my motivation just kinda left me bc of all drama on my discord. For example, someone tore up the ENTIRE server that (granted) me and raisenfawl mainly spent 2 months working to build and in the process, we've grown a stronger bond and the server was growing and became fun. We've also been working on building for projects and getting teams up for those projects and also had fun. All those funny and unforgettable moments could've been looked back at today but nope. All good things dont last ig bc someone decided to tear ALL of it down in favor of a bare-bones reboot that has all the charm of an average Joe on discord. OG (a role in my server) is given to ppl who had a vision for this server, it's given to ppl who helped me find who I am and supported me along the 2 month lifespan of the "good" server. OG is given to the ppl who helped me with Deadly Duels from the start, OG is given to ppl who composed with Groovepad, a very, VERY, limited music making app that pretty much makes the music for you. OG is pretty much the Co-founders of the server. But now, it's just a tool to do with it whatever they pleased, now, it's lost it's charm and worth. And with the new server overhaul, it's like all the magic of the server like I mentioned before had been sucked right out of it. Channels either deleted or reworked with all messages gone, and hollow. I'm not attacking anyone who was involved in the overhaul, I'm just saying why I was so sad. And that's not all. I have drama going on romantically with people peer pressuring me to date them, and in general just stress with dates. For example, Me and Bloodygirl hated Abdel and we still do to this day. Abdel is a pedophilic minor abuser. He litterally drew porn of h ik m and Bloodygirl's OC..... getting freaky. I saw it myself on a wb and I was petrified. Abdel was pissed that I was in there so I said fuck off I was invited here and he ignored me and continued to draw porn. So yeah, We both hate Abdel. But then eventually after some disagreements on discord, t
The Bloodygirl vs CJ13 BS began and lasted a month. Boom, that should've been the end. No, Bloody got into drama with Abdel again and I got dragged into it. I unwillingly asked what was wrong and it seems that Abdel was "hacking" her again so I told her to block him. After that, she confessed that she liked me and I was in shock. I had to pick between making her even sadder or making her happy and I (unwillingly again) said yes. Even though we had a rough past, I didn't like to see her like that so I had to. I don't like being mean to ppl but at this point, I'm just ready to lash out at any human I see within a 2 meter radius. Fast forward to now and alot has happened. I'm being accused of being ReadySetGo and then I have to deal with my male friend who wants a romantic relationship with me (not being homophobic, but I'm not into that type of stuff), and then someone got mad bc of a joke, left and when I tried to talk to them, they said fuck you and blocked me. And now Im at risk of losing another as I type. I'm so throughly sick of life and I can't take it anymore. As well as this, my yt videos are barely pushing 10 views a day, and my AM is dying slowly. So yeah, I'm ready to just quit at this point. I just wanted friends to talk to and relate to and an audience to show my stuff to, I didn't want any of this. So I'm sorry, but I don't think I might be here for long. But if I do eventually decide to ditch animemaker, it's been fun.
-Sincerely, Corry "CJ13" McDonald.

2 years ago 95 views 4 frames