slowly going insane (3)

Dear diary,                                March 5th 1770
We're barely chugging along with the money, most days we go without eating, or eating too little. There was a terrible fight today, the Boston massacre, my husband fought in it. He's always been the rebellious type, but it bit him in the back today. There was shouting, I originally thought that was just the protesting, but once I heard the shots I knew something bad was going down. I could only watch it happening, I couldn't bring myself to move. I do this stupid thing when I get nervous or the tinyest bit scared, my bones lock, I freese up;  I can't move.
My husband came home today and he wasn't the same as usual. He's normally happy, bubbly, and lively once he walks through the door, but not today. He walked in, said nothing, not even hello, not even good evening, didn't ask how my day was, didn't pay me any mind. Just walked towards the bedroom, hunched over, silent. I don't know what happened today, but I know that T'wasn't good.

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