Can relate. Its whatwver works for you

To me it's actually hard to talk with friends or family because they can't even help me that much sometimes they make my things worse

Irl freinds could help you personally. Unless you feel more comfortable sharing it online instead of in person

I didn't do it because I was actually stuck

They made me scream because they wanted to hug me but that stupid toy on my face
Idk why but I don't want rl friends