Yk the thing that most hurts being the backup friend??
Its that youre "just there." I'm just there. I'm always trying to help everyone else when no one else is there for them, I chase everyone. My "friends" wanna vent and shit to me, but they don't give one fuck when I'm bleeding on the floor lmao. Hopefully 2024 goes alot better. 🙏
The only people I actually can talk to is danny. Not even Hayden anymore, he never wants to be there for me but he'd do anything for everyone else. I'm only around him when no body else wants to be. No one cares about me, not even danny. I just gotta be there for everyone else so they don't feel like I do. I don't want people to feel as bad as I do, that's why I try taking care of and being there for everyone else, I love everyone even if they hate me, or are just wanting me there
I'm trying to not "let myself go" I'm gonna have high hopes for the new year, and I'm just gonna make it on my own. I'm gonna try stopping conversations with anyone, since they cannot do the same for me. No body likes to stay for me. RULE 1: DONT BELEIVE WHEN SOMEONE SAYS THEY WOULD NEVER LEAVE, no matter how much someone thinks that it is most likely not true. Everyone leaves at one point.
I may not be the best person you'd meet, but I sure as hell will continue to care about and be there for anyone, whether I liek them or not, I give people tons of chances to change. I believe that everyone has challenges whether mentally or at home. I will always try to see the best in people, even if they're considered rude, mean, and anything along the lines. I will forever try seeing peoples best even if they don't have the strength to see it themselves, I will.
Sorry about this vent, but I needed to put it somewhere. No body wants to listen. I am done trying to get help for myself I am officially letting myself go and I will continue to do what others couldn't do for me.
I love yall tho, the am comun is one of the best places for friends and shit imo<3 you guys are some of the kindest people Ik
Have a good day or night lovelys,
-Willow
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