Exposer and done.

Uhh… this is… a song I wrote… it kind of expresses my emotions… I have never wrote a song but… I think I did ok… it is a sad song… it’s about my friends. It doesn’t completely express haw I feel but it gives a small bit of haw I do.

I felt alone.
Depression put me near end.
Dwellings in sorrows and painful feelings of dread.

I felt for you, wanted to make amens.
All I could think was I really missed my friends.
was sick to my stomach when I left because I hurt them bad.

I said things I never ment.
and used some chance I should have kept.
I tried my best.
I truly did, but never the lest my best is my best.
If I had the ability I would go back and try again…

🎶

But then I thought back.
Remember my past.
Remember the lies and the false acts.
Remember our fights and mental cracks.

I look back and see your lies.
You show my face and degrade there eyes.
You waisted your time, no I wasted mine.
I seen your messages your care was a lie.
I hurt you, you hurt me worse.
I was a toy and nothing more.

You said it yourself.
You waited for my low.
Then you ghosted me left me alone.
You wanted me alone.
You wanted to hurt me.
Then you told everyone I hurt you when all I wanted was an apology.

I bully your friend?
Ples explain.
I insulted Christianity?
Elaborate.

I had a job and had other join.
I fired them all so we could reform.
Rebuild and region.
But then depression hit me and I never made it.

You seemed to make it worse.
You say you never looked at my post because they wore vante.
Did that not worry you?

I was alone.
Alone with my mind.
Alone with the time.
Alone with no right to find.
Alone with thought of razors and thought of relief grinding on vain and flesh.

I had been cursed with a constant thought of suicida.
And it was you who gave it to me.
The one I trusted most.
I may have been weird but that because I was losing my mind and needed help.
You wore my help but look where I am.

I never came after you and you know I would have never, but you have hurt me more then I thought you’d ever.
Naw I stand on this ground shacking with every thought. Blood clotting in my guts.

What a Christian you are.
Doesn’t Jesus love all?
Would he love me for things I’ve done?
And if so would he have helped?
You punished me worse then death and I hold by a thread.
You put me in that seat and I just don’t understand.
Why the path you had chose… was to leave one of us humans for dead.

Murders a sin… but you murdered my soul… at least I can see I’m going to hell…

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