(Very, very long Vent)

People are really testing my patience

A lot has happened over the course of these months
I have a boyfriend now, which is AWESOME!! His screen name is Twix

Anyway, to the actual vent
I have this friend that I'm gonna call.. erm
Jane (Jane, doe lol!!!!)
And Jane caught "feelings" for me
But Jane had tried getting with 2 people prior
Jane says they did that because she was desperate
Desperate for love
This leads me to believe that Jane never had feelings for me and just sought out the support and love from a romantic relationship
Jane, at one point, decided to confess her "love" to me
Of course, I said no
I said I was sorry
Jane said she was sorry and said to forget everything
I said okay.

The next morning
Jane got into it again
Jane even begged me to give her a chance 3 times
I said no to every single one
I have a boyfriend, aka Twix
I don't like girls, and Jane is just a friend
Jane now thinks she's genderfluid and maybe even bisexual
Instead of lesbian and cis..
Jane also made remarks about him and was just rude in general
Even in Twix and Jane's dms
And even in my own server
Twix is always nice to Jane
But Jane just doesn't like Twix
Because Jane thinks Twix could be a predator because Twix is with me because Twix is too much like Jane's old partner
Jane's old partner was horrible

Now, Jane resents Twix, and even told me that it wasn't going to work out between Twix and I Since Jane thought it would be happily ever after, but it wasn't- and feels that the same will happen to me At one point, Jane had a "Splitting" episode. look up "Bpd Splitting" if you don't know what that is. I will kinda summarize what happened, lol
Jane - "Look, I don't think we can be friends anymore. I can't do this. This hurts, seeing you with Twix when I could treat you so much better."
The second I went to say MY goodbyes, Jane went
"Wait, no, fuck, I'm sorry, please don't leave me."
And begged me to stay?
Like. You either want me there or you want me gone.

Anyway, over the past three weeks, we've been discussing stuff, yada yada.
She had the nerve to tell me that I wasn't pouring into her cup.. per her therapists words. I have sent so many fucking paragraphs, struggled to keep our relationship, took the time out of my day to try and write those damn paragraphs (which takes me hours.) I put SO MUCH fucking effort into our relationship, and she BARELY entertains the conversation. I just get "Yeah, thanks for explaining" or "okay" to most of my shit like dude. You can't expect me to stay if it's only one-sided

The reason she feels like I'm not putting enough effort is because I have OTHER friends AND a boyfriend to spend time with. I made a HORRIBLY long paragraph explaining WHY I can't always spend or make time for her..
It was explaining how I couldn't fit everyone into one day, and I had to schedule people in. If I tried to fit everyone into one day, I wouldn't have time for myself or my family. I said that my main priority was my family and my boyfriend.. since he's like family to me.. and she took that as she was just someone I could call when I felt like it.. and took that as "You're pushing people away," like WHAT? IM PURPOSELY making time for everyone and trying my damndest. She wants to be my main priority and be someone who I choose first. Unfortunately, I have a family and a boyfriend who I like to spend time with?

After all of that happened, we were kinda chill for a while.
Jane said she wanted to repair our relationship (which is pretty fucking far beyond repair). I was like.. okay yeah let's do that.
HOWEVER, December 16th, something came up AGAIN
Basically, Jane wanted to invite two people to my discord server. Their friend R.. and R's "sibling," J.
Jane has been friends with R for a long time, so I felt like I would've heard about their "sibling"

R and J are invited, and it was cool for a bit until J posted some art. J's art looked a LOT like my ex best friend's art.. who did some pretty bad stuff and kinda hurt me a lot?
I went to Jane about this, asking about J's art, saying it looked a LOT like my ex best friends.
Well, Jane decided to lie and say it was coincidental and that they've met a lot of people with the same art style.
I said, "Well, there's no way it could be exbestfriend. Plus, you're my friend, you wouldn't lie to me."
But wait, I did some thinking
Jane talked to Exbestfriend in november.. and J's account was made on November 30th. That definitely rose some suspicion. So, I did some digging. I looked at J and I's mutual servers.. and we had one in common. I looked at their display name, and it looked a LOT like Exbestfriend's username in a game I play. I ask Jane, and Jane says she'll answer in a second and that she's finishing up her assignment.. which I'm pretty sure was a lie, and that she was communicating with Exbestfriend because I caught on.
I decided fuck it, and looked up J's username in the game I play, and sure enough, it was Exbestfriend's account. How do I know? It had a masterpiece (in-game art form) with Exbestfriend's name on it.

I go to Jane about this, and she finally admits that she snuck Exbestfriend into my server, and even fucking admitted that she wouldntve told me if I hadn't said anything, because she didn't realize her actions effects, and that she was very, very sorry, asking for me not to be mad at Exbestfriend and Jane's friend R.

I said it wasn't okay, to never lie to me again because that wasn't cool, and we left it like that. (Obviously, I wrote a paragraph about it)

Just. After everything we've been through. I held Jane while she cried, held her hand to comfort her, and talked her through her not so good thoughts FREQUENTLY. After all of that, all the paragraphs we sent, you have the nerve to say you want to REPAIR our relationship and lie to me immediately after?

If you want to be my friend, then treat me like one.

13 hours ago 24 views 1 frames 6 Like

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