its like happiness has been permanently removed from my brain

why lately am i always so sad and just miserable
im pushing myself away from everything but i just cant help it
years of emotional neglect has just built up to the point i just dont know how to be anymore
i cant even help myself i just need to get through the day and hope i make it to another one alive
im just a walking burden at this point
i should stop trying to be relevant
im just some hypocrite who says that nobody should think i matter and that im useless but then other times i overthink and wonder if people care about me as much as i care for them
to make matters worse my parents are disappointed in me and i have yet more detentions
ill probably have one after school now which would be my first detention after school instead of just during my break
i cant muster up any motivation to even look at them my mom has to straight up force me
is this depression

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