Story time!

I didn't know how to walk until I was 5 and I didn't know how to talk until I was around 6 to 7
I think it was because of how my mum treated me and deprived me of interacting with anyone even herself (instead of looking after me she usually just smoked and did weed then for the rest of the day ignore me she like never really talked around me unless it was to yell at me when I was to loud or when I cried)
I remember lurning how to write before even knowing how to speak I mean I would try but like I just really struggled to put together words mostly because I was scared I would get yelled at but when I finally did lurn to speak my first few words it was sorta easy for me to lurn more
I remember being picked on so much for struggling to speak in my first few years in school I was also a very emotionally unstable kid I remember just crying for no reason randomly and like hiding away im even not sure why I did it
It also took until I was 10 for me to finally be potty trained not because I was stubborn or anything my mum just never really taught me to until then she would also...do things to me while changing me
But were not here to talk about that
Uhhhhhh idk I think that's enough of 7-5 year old me let's move on to 8-12 year old me :)
I used to be picked on alot in school when I was younger like holy hell it fucking ruined me but it like helped me to develop self awareness and help realise that no one will truly be happy with you in this world and that its ok to desperately cling to anyone and everyone that doesn't imidietly hate you and basically do whatever thay say to not be alone again like i just let them basically do whatever thay wanted to me in return for the tiniest bit of affection since it was the only place I could get it and like the person who gave me the most affection out of them all id do anything to be anywhere close to them no matter what thay did to me it also taught me pain is one of the only forms of love ill probably ever get no Matter how much I say it hurts and beg for it to stop id always come crawling back and beg to be loved again and apologise for the things that thay did like the disgusting piece of shit I am I even still do it
So the only "friends" i had back then irl used me for there own enjoyment
Fuck i didn't even earn my irl friends i have now I was introduced to them out of pity by the teachers because why not add a disgusting freak like me to a already weird group It was the first time I was really accepted with open arms by anyone really i mean all I used to do was pace up and down the quad mindlessly over and over again every day
I was a really pathetic and useless kid and I seemingly still am

Translate

2 months ago 27 views 1 frames 3 Like