It’s all my fault. (Vent post, cringe.)

No matter what I do. No matter what I say. I hurt people and it isn’t okay. I left so many marks on so many people with my words and here I am. I’m so selfish and I don’t even know it. I don’t deserve any kindness, I’m a sick person with sick ideals.

No matter what I do, I still hurt the people I’m close to. They forgave me, but I never forgave myself. I ruined my favorite persons self esteem, and I fucking hate myself for it. What the fuck is wrong with me?

I touch myself at night and I lay there thinking about how I was touched by that man. How he said all those things to me. How he told me how I was nothing without him. And maybe he was right. Maybe I am nothing without him. Maybe I deserved to be touched like that and used. And I’ll never forgive myself for lying there and touching myself thinking about those times. I’m disgusted by myself. I make myself sick.

I wish I could just say the right think and help the people around me. But I can’t. Because I don’t know how to help people. Because I’m selfish. Selfish people never change, and I have never changed.

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1 months ago 49 views 1 frames 1 Like

RUSTYB1RD

Hating what you’ve said is ok. Hating your old self is ok. But hating yourself? That’s not. And I know that is SO lame and unhelpful put into words but trust me, I get it. Support group told me that last year and I HATED it for months. But one day it kinda just clicked for me? I dunno. You can hate that you think those things. It’s understandable but thinking that BECAUSE you do those things you’re a scumbag undeserving of anything is NOT. And it’s so much easier said than done trust me, but just keeping that in mind helped me immensely with my self image. You deserve to not hate yourself just as much as you did not deserve that trauma. You are loved. You are kind. And you are DEFINITELY gonna stop feeling this way someday and I’m so excited for when you do. (Sorry I kinda disappeared from ur comments but I couldn’t scroll past this pose)

1 months ago Reply

Kewbic

I think you're one of the most human people (I don't know how to describe it, you have more than 1 emotion so it feels like I can talk to you and you'll respond and its not like an autograph) I've ever seen on the internet next to my best friend, u are kind, funny, draw cool, and probably kinda humble I've never seen u brag about your greek sculpturing level drawings, idk what else to say to describe how I think you stand out vs a lot of other people and I'm glad I feel that u are a friend to me

1 months ago Reply

✨Cherry Piss My Pants✨

STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP BRO BE CONFIDENT ABT YOURSELF!!!! YOU ARE LOVED YOU ARE TREASURED YOU ARE SPECIAL YOU ARE NEEDED WE ALL LOVE YOU NOBODY HATES YOU AND IF THEY DO CALL THEM A HATER GIRL YOU BETTER SAY "YOU'RE A DAMN ACCIDENT AND A HATER AND THATS WHY YOUR PARENTS KNEW THEY SHOULD'VE KILLED YOU!!!" I LOVE YOU AS A BESTIE AND AS A FUCKING SISTER BRO❤️❤️❤️❤️ YOU ARE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BESTIE THAT I HAVE IN THIS SITUATION!!!! DON'T EVER STOP LOVING YOURSELF!!!!❤️❤️❤️❤️🩷🩷🩷😊😊😊😊😊💞💞💞😊😊😊😊😊

1 months ago Reply

stage5diahrea/ Molly

Hey, I’m sorry you feel this way. You may say you don’t deserve kindness or love, but you do. You do, you need love and kindness.
You always made silly posts and were kind to a lot of people. Including me.
Forgiving is hard to do, trust me. But once you forgive, it makes you feel a lot better. I know you can get through this.
I hope you get better soon <3

1 months ago Reply

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