Uhm well

Hello— again (:

It has been 255 days since I last posted— and I greatly apologize. The reason to why my absence was immensely long was because of school, confidence, etc.

Quick summary of what I’m going to say so your time is saved: My confidence has decreased which rendered me to not post any of my work for an immense amount of time. I believe I won’t be posting much anymore— but I’ll possibly be online.

I’ve lost the majority of my confidence. I’ve created many drafts of unfinished illustrations and animations whenever I would come back to AnimeMaker, though I never found their appearances appealing despite them just being a work in progress. I felt the need to make my art look at least decent enough to be displayed— but I never approved of my drawings, I never got there. This became a loop of create, criticize, and trash. Create, criticize, and trash. This rendered me to become dreary of maintaining the constant burden of my art being good enough for people, and so I wasn’t able to post anything. Even if my art was nice enough for satisfaction, it would seem like falsified hope which makes me uncertain, it makes me feel as if my pride would rather be greed if I received admiration for my disdainful efforts.
And for school, just in general I was busy. Nothing much but school work, projects, studying, and excruciating mental deterioration. Though now that it’s the summer vacation, I suppose I can relieve the pent up stress.

Again— I apologize for past, and future absences ( including this absence ). I wouldn’t be surprised if many of you forgot me and unfollowed an account that is frequently dead. I don’t think I’ll be posting much anymore as I did before, sadly. But I’m not planning on deleting AnimeMaker. And— another apology for my vent, I do my best to not share any of my problems, but this time, I believe it would have been efficient if I would have just stated it so the explanation to my disappearances would be less nebulous.

Anyway— I hope you all have an exquisite summer break! (:
( and thank you to those who understand, it means a lot— though this wasn’t much of a big deal. )