I'm sorry you have to feel like this, a person very close to me felt suicidal and it took 4 years to not feel unstable, I can only hope you feel somewhat better sooner, I know you never just 'recover' from this stuff. I wish i could tell you shit will get better but I don't know. I wish i could say something that will make you feel better for even a second but i don't know. So I can only wish that you don't feel like this for long and be moved from a therapist to therapist. And i know my wish doesn't count for shit but I hope it has some sort of comfort for you in your shitty situation.