and there's nothing wrong with venting just want to point that out, my advice is to get a piece of paper and write how u feel it helps get your thoughts organized together and makes u feel somewhat better and try find something that comforts you (show,person,book,music) anything and spend time your time doing whatever it is that makes u feel comfort
I know its hard but you have to accept yourself, instead of pointing out the parts you don't like start pointing out the parts you do like, try say something positive to yourself everyday it really can help it might not seem much but the more you do it the more of an effect if has, and starving yourself wont do anything it wont help at all, I know getting to eat is hella hard but find a comfort food and eat somewhere u fund comforting and don't think about the food instead get yourself distracted
basically do whatever you want and don't take in consideration what people may think, you have one life so why waste it thinking about what others think
i guess in this generation everyone is acting more mature, if you look back to the 2000's 11 year olds were way more childish then how the majority act now mostly because of the influence of social media but in my opinion there isnt anything wrong with being childish, i myself am 12 yet still enjoy things other people my age could consider childish