oi, so im mad that literally everyone has better grades than me

especially one of my friend, who has like As in every goddam subject, even is the DELEGUEE and he still complains about his grades & stuff
i'm super sad and mad because of that
i know it's bad to judge someone by their grades, but damn, it hurts so much
i feel like such shit
even ppl who gave up a little on learning have at least Bs in most subjects...
and it hurts even more when i know, that it is entirely my fault
because i don't give a fuck about lessons, i can't focus as HELL in homework & class
i can't even just work anymore
i get more and more unmotivated everyday
but... its just school right?
there isn't only that in life
i love life way too much to give up already
i wanna cry gdjakzhks