What would that do?

I haven't started at all and refuse to take a single one.

That’s terrible I’m so sorry you’re going through this and I genuinely hope you get off it for your sake.

Let's be frank. You need to get out of there. I can't recall if you have a job but you need to save some many and try to get an apartment or at least a friend who would let you stay. Now I wouldn't blame you if you have social anxiety but sometimes the beast medicine for that is a job. Once you make a friend there everything will get easier. It's a lot of work but I do believe you can get through. It would also help your mental health a lot.

The only bits and pieces I remember are like because I apparently lack estrogen in the first place ((WHICH DOESN'T MATTER TO ME))

I dont need either estrogen or testosterone. I'm fine without. Aswell as extremely not wanting any.

I wouldn't know how to approach the topic saying I simply don't want to take any.

I have extreme gender dysphoria due to this