Gosh, I'm sorry to hear that.
And dating is not a sin.
Everyone is going to date and have crushes as a child, it's normal. Just don't engage in inappropriate behavior, and you'll be fine.
And I get where you are coming from, relationships are pretty hard to deal with, that's honestly why I may not even try to get a date right now.
But I wouldn't worry about that, don't waste your time. Just have fun. If they make you happy, then I suggest you not to worry much about it.