Eh... You ever feel useless sometimes?
(can't?)
I'm becoming REALLY anxious around people... Even online... What happens when I am to scared to talk to people completely?
On a side note... Do you guys ever feel constantly thirsty and drained if energy no matter how much you drink?
On a side side note. What's the least painful way besides a gun.
Ok screw it nobady is looking anyways might as well keep adding:
I really really don't want to be an adult. I have lost all of my irl social skills. I used to be able to go in to a room and come out with everyone as a friend. Now I'm to scared to talk and I dont know why. I dont know why I hate myself so much, and I dont know why I dont want ti be here so much. It could be rational stuff because i just moved but I feel like ive been like this for years. Nobody around me IRL is there for me. I aprecheat you guys online but like... I dont really talk to you. May like... One of you, maybe two know me decently. I just really don't want to feel my heart anymore. It makes it hard to sleep. And it hurts because of this stupid fucking literal hole because OFC I cant be born normally! They take my eyes, my brain, my stomach, my lungs, my heart, and my stomach! What else ya know? My dick too because why not? Why doesn't someone choke me to death? Ide drown myself! Finish the job of 2011. Why cant i even hold on to someone? Everyone loves me. Gosh I'm such a messed up person. I don't deserve a bed. Poor people I've hurt to. Gosh... My irl friends would say some crazy unhelpful things rn. Probably joke about what I'm saying or nod and go off to talk about some dumb shit as usual. School could kill me... Ehghmmm.... 22 miners now and no comments... Even my music isn't helping me rn. I've already heard it allllll... Maybe I'm just bored...... Can you really get bored of life?
Why do I talk the way I do? Stupid fucking inspirational poitry shit. I don't even talk like that in real life. I can't even collect a thought and say it. Nobody really listens to me do they? They really shouldn't. I'm gross for even ranting really. i am always told that I'm spoiled and that i have a lot but I'm not always so sure... All my phones are hand me downs or below $40, ive only ever had one conceal, always get the small room because I feel like I'm constantly moving, always ignored because I'm *dumb" my grandparents hsve lived with us my whole life because there druggys and alcoholics. Hell nvm just my grandma! Because my grampa ran away because he is doing cocaine and shit with needles at his momes house! My sisters hate me so much... My mom isn't even there... Always on her ohone or at work... But no no... Stop... I'm not hit or anything so I'm good... I'm quite and I do what I'm told... I... Try in school and I'm there as much as I can be, even when I'm sick... As I should... But what for? Work? So I can get a job? Work foe the rest if my life not to die? I dont want to do that... Gosh I can't even stay on one topic... I should starve myself I'm fat... Or I feel fat... I should stop thinking... IVE typed to much...
34 miners no views.
I worry for OUTCAZT. I wonder if it's propriet to put this here but as i said... Nobody will get this far... Anyways... There a good person... Or at least they could be... Idk ive never really got to know know there. But... There not a bad person... At most they are maybe stuck up and moody and those aren't even really bad! I'm stuck up and moody sometimes. They need to get out of there house though, there living situation isn't good for there mental health... Pft... What can I say?... I'm sorry Mystic for the things ive done. You didn't deserve that. I need to be more observing... Maybe thats ine reason I'm scared to talk to people now? Not blaming anyone though... Anyways sorry... Your a hard working person... You two Retro... Really good people there... Wish I could be you guys... Like... Good at sports, crafty, caring, handy, good people in general really. Though I must admit you two still have your moments. DWC your a very ADHD person and I like it. Good at making charicters to. And beautiful art. Even when you wore small (yes I've seen). Not going to go through everyone, I'm just thinking rn and typing as I do...... Actually... No yea I'll continue...
I am so angry at the first person I dated here. They made me in to a horable uncontrolled person which personally I blame for ending my second relationship! I could have been somone better... I'm so suspectable to being manipulated... I'm so easy to push over aren't I?... I need to stop helping people who dont want help...
45 minet no views... I need to sleep it's 3:30AM... Gosh... GOD! I will be judged hard... If that's all real I really dont feel like I'm getting anywhere good... Iiiiimmm going to hell... Yea... I'm inveloped by lust and greed... Or I feel like it... Pft... How did it come to me being like thiiiissss???? Im going to try to go to bed... Might come back...
This User's Other Animes
Get App
Draw your original anime with iOS/Android App!
