Yeah, But have you ever considered apologizing or talking to one of the members of the group about it and how you may have realized it?, It's important to actually do that now, But I dont really think a sorry might be enough for that, But maybe actually telling them what may have happened change them, This may be beneficial for you to let off some of that pressure that you may have, But if you have tried to but still was the dark humoured one when you were banned previously and was talking to a member, Maybe try an alt and apologize to em